I’m okay really.
I mean, after thinking about it, all I really wanted to know was if will it ever work? When things are still going wrong or getting worse is it time for change, or time for patience? I’m reacting to more and more food, eczema flares, nose runs, bumps and lumps and aches and pains and the rest. I still don’t trust my memory, never feel well or well slept, and the sores on my back have returned. I’m mopey and tired and worried about becoming one of those chronic illness people. Because nothing helps and if it’s all far too vague you become not only chronically ill but also chronically ignored.
Probably patience for now. There’s a lot lingering from from that silly gluten challenge damaging my guts and kicking off a year of bad health and bad luck. I’m probably not going to eat gluten again and I’m not proud to have become one of those people but it really is a problem for me. I’d love to feel as good as I did those days imediently after the challenge and maybe someday I’ll reach that potential again. Smarter, more alert, calmer and more connected to the earth than I’ve ever was before or since that week. Colours were brighter, life taster sweeter and the written word sharper too.
It seems that we are large complex beings made up of what was, at one point, entirely foreign matter. To think that what we put inside our bodies has no effect on our make up seems, to my newly gained experience, misinformed.
Patience. At least for now.